Discovery

I've been doing a lot of soul searching recently. I am dedicating 2010 to becoming a better person and to be the best me I can. I've had to overcome a lot of difficult things in my 27 years. I am getting healthier. I am in remission and I'm keeping up hope that my cancer won't come back (crosses fingers.) I am now over most of my anxiety and depression and slowly dealing with my mom's passing. Suddenly I have a zest for life again. I feel creative. I'm becoming more aware of myself and of my world. I can finally see things with new eyes. And I love what I see.

I have compiled a list of 15 things or so...My goals for 2010. And one of them is to acknowledge beauty every day. I notice that with my new interest in photography, it allows me to find the beauty in everything. I am constantly looking at things to take pictures of. I am focused on being in the present moment always. It feels wonderful. It's funny how things unfold and how perfectly things work themselves out. How my realization of this coincidentally came with an interest in photography, and vice versa.

God's plan for us is always the right one.

Another goal of mine is to simply be kind. If I had to choose just one goal, it would be this. Never pass up an opportunity to be kind.

My meetings with my therapist have helped a great deal in doing what makes me happy. She's very encouraging. I enjoy my talks with her. Part of my 2010 focus is improving my physical health. I am very lucky to have encountered two great doctors (that happen to be best friends) that support integrative and complementary medicine. I am looking forward to finally feeling great physically after feeling horrible and run-down for so long.

Another thing I am dedicating myself to is to be thankful and grateful every day for everything. We take things for granted and forget how we acquired them. We have an abundance of things it's just downright disgusting. And yet we're never satisfied. We fill our voids with STUFF. I wish I could get rid of all my material possessions and just be content with the simplicity of life. I think it's possible but I'm just not willing to do it right now. For that I am disappointed in myself. We've forgotten how to make genuine connections with people and instead let technology rule us. I'm just sick of it. But how to change it?